Grief Brain Made Me Run A Red Light!
For anyone not familiar with the term "grief brain" I sincerely hope you never have to experience it. After losing Keven I was warned by parents who'd lost a child to overdose about this very real symptom of surviving a traumatic loss.
Earlier today I emailed the cherished leader of my writing group, Heidi, about a mistake I'd made and said something like, "forgive my brain, I'm not as sharp as I used to be". Then this happened...
After my daily walk with Chester B and Evo we were headed home in the car and came to the same intersection we cross daily. The signal was red so I stopped to wait for a green light. A moment later I realized I was driving through the red light! I had looked both ways (thankfully) and must have forgot that I was at a light. No harm done but this kind of stuff happens to me almost every day and its been 11 months now (as of tomorrow).
If you like scientific evidence and explanations of WHY this happens, here's the link a Discover Magazine article titled:
The Traumatic Loss of a Loved One is Like Experiencing a Brain Injury
Here is a quote from the article:
“Grieving is a protective process. It’s an evolutionary adaptation to help us survive in the face of emotional trauma.”
Then I saw this on Instagram written by a highly respected expert in dealing with grief, Megan Devine:
Grief impacts coordination. Your mind is so busy trying to make sense of a world that no longer makes sense, it's no wonder you're less coordinated — dropping things, knocking things over, accidentally bashing your knees, fingers, toes, or elbows, or just generally misjudging your spatial awareness.
I can't wait to have time to read Megan's book cover to cover "Its Ok Not to be Ok", I've heard great things about it but have been too busy writing to read much these days (there is a light at the end of my tunnel!)
The photo below says it all. The big question is: How long does this @#&* last? At least a year, but how much longer? I'll let you know when I find out. Its different for everyone, my guess is it will take a few years for my brain to be back to normal, at which time the natural aging process may wreak havoc with my poor brain, so who knows!
Thanks for reading this - you all rock my world by sharing in my journey!
Photo Credit: Shoplaywood/Shutterstock)